Reasons You Shouldn’t Fuck Kids

Reason #32: Cutting
December 23, 2008, 1:16 am
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , ,

It was a week before my nineteenth birthday when I first cut my arms. I was in such emotional pain, and it seemed like it would be such a relief to cut my arms up. I knew that I could see a cut on my arm and say “Yes, this is real”, whereas when I said I was hurting inside because my brother molested me, no one could see that was real.

In my senior year of college (when I was 21), I lived with my two best friends. One was my roommate, and the other was my housemate. One day I cut my legs since my arms were already all cut up. I had just finished cutting when my roommate walked in and exclaimed “Oh ‘Butterfly’, not your legs too.” She looked so sad when she said it.

If you are unfamiliar with the world of cutting, you would probably consider it weird to inflict a physical wound for the relief of an emotional one. And you would be right. It is weird. This is yet another reason you shouldn’t fuck kids. We grow up and cut ourselves to make ourselves feel better about the disgusting ways that you cut us first.

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I started cutting when I was 8 years old or so. I still do it, although I try HARD not to *SIGH*. I wrote a big blog about cutting, I don’t know if you have read it yet or not, but it is there if you would like to have a read. I have come to love your blog, it is nice to come to a place where someone really understands, I feel at home here. Thank you for writing.

Comment by V

[…] I wasn’t busy thinking about suicide or throwing up, I was busy cutting myself. That was Reason 32 why you shouldn’t fuck kids. It was always difficult to clean my […]

Pingback by 35 Reasons You Shouldn’t Fuck Kids: 2008 in Review « Reasons You Shouldn’t Fuck Kids

Hi Butterfly,

I have never cut. But it is survivors like you, and others, who cut that have explained it to me. I feel so much compassion for those who do and I do understand why now. I’m sorry for the pain yous go through. Thank you for sharing. I think that is very brave of you.



Comment by kate1975

[…] had so many patterns of scars on her arms that I recognized her as a fellow cutter. I had been cutting myself for a year by then.  I wanted to reach out and touch her arm and tell her she wasn’t alone, […]

Pingback by Reason #152: My friend cuts herself « Reasons You Shouldn’t Fuck Kids

I had a roommate that used to cut herself. She used to get so dissociated, that I think she used it to bring herself back. I read somewhere awhile back a web site for survivors who cut and how they do things like squeeze ice to get an intense sensation instead of cutting as a way of finding healthier alternatives.

Comment by sworddancewarrior

it was in adulthood i started cutting (stopped now) childhood i would try to break bones, burn myself, cause injury, that was way back before it was “common” i didn’t know why back then.

Comment by buckwheatsrisk

[…] reasons she cut herself were similar to my reasons. In her case, she was raped by her then-boyfriend (when she was 15).  In my case, three people […]

Pingback by Reason #294: The Man in the Hotel Room « Reasons You Shouldn’t Fuck Kids

[…] of this whole thing is that about two weeks ago, I had some serious urges to cut.  I thought about cutting my arms, which was always my place of choice.  But I didn’t feel comfortable doing that because it is summer and my workplace would […]

Pingback by Reason #298: Our Burdens Get Too Heavy To Carry « Reasons You Shouldn’t Fuck Kids

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