Reasons You Shouldn’t Fuck Kids

Reason #36: The Morning
January 6, 2009, 1:30 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , ,

On the weekends, the huz and I take turns getting up with the baby. On Saturdays he gets up. On Sundays I get up. During the week, I get up with the baby, get him dressed, feed him, etc.

The baby generally wakes around 6AM. It’s still dark out at 6AM. The huz doesn’t like to get up with the baby because the thing he fears most in this world is shit. Literally, shit. He is afraid the baby will shit and he will have to change a diaper with shit in it. Shit doesn’t bother me for the most part, thank goodness. (That’s marriage, being strong where the other is weak, and vice-versa if you’re lucky.)

Anyway, getting up with the baby is difficult for me because at 6AM it is still dark out. I am afraid of the dark – that was actually the very first reason I brought up for why you shouldn’t fuck kids. So here’s how my morning with the baby goes. Baby wakes up, I look at the clock. 6AM. Fuck. That means it is still dark out.

Take the baby downstairs. All the lights are out. Start breathing funny, while talking to self “It’s okay. Everything’s okay.” Turn on all possible lights. Check the locks again, even though I did so last night before going to bed. Wait, wait, is that a sound I hear? Everything be quiet right now – let me listen. Listen for a few seconds. Everything is still and quiet. I am terrified.

Turn on Sesame Street, change baby’s diaper. Furtively look around. Is someone trying to break in? What time is it? 6:15AM. About 45 mins till some light starts to appear in the sky. Make baby some breakfast, which means going into the kitchen. Through the kitchen is a window in the other room that has a broken venetian blind slat thing that I can see the darkness outside. Can they see me too? Horrible. I am terrified. What time is it? 6:20AM. Okay, only 40 mins till light.

And that is how my morning goes until the sun comes up. I am missing out on this precious time with my sweet beautiful son, and my son is missing one ‘whole’ mama till the huz gets up. This is why you shouldn’t fuck kids.

3 Comments so far
Leave a comment

I can kind of relate to what you are writing here. I normally love the dark (with candles lit), but every few months I get a kind of “insomnia” where I absolutely cannot sleep until I see the sun come up. I get scared I will die if I do. I know it is a direct result of something my “Dad” did to me. I DO get scared when I hear noises around my apartment, because “Dad” still stalks me. I am always afraid he will come in on me in the night and hurt me. *SIGH* This is no life for us to live, is it?

Comment by V

Hi V,

You know, you make an excellent point here. This is not really a great way to live, constantly afraid like this. My husband, nothing scares him. But he had a good childhood, with parents who made him feel safe, secure, and loved.

– Butterfly

Comment by butterflysblog

I too am scared of the dark. It can make me have a full on panic attack, well it has several times when power went out and went lights were turned off unexpectedly. I hate that.

Good and healing thoughts to you.


Comment by kate1975

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: