Reasons You Shouldn’t Fuck Kids

Reason 101: Lars and the Real Girl

Last night, my husband and I watched this movie “Lars and the Real Girl”. It was one of those truly beautiful movies that stay with you for a long time. In the movie, Lars buys one of those lifesize dolls and thinks that she is real. He takes her out everywhere, talks to her, and ‘hears’ her responses to him.

His brother and sister-in-law take him to the shrink, for obvious reasons. The shrink tells the brother that Lars is having a delusion, and that he needs to play along with it. The brother says “No. Everyone will laugh at him.” The shrink agrees with him and tells him that he has to play along anyway. She tells him that even if he doesn’t play along, Lars will not be swayed from his delusion.

The brother has a hard time with it, but he plays along. The sister-in-law not only plays along too, but also tells her friends and church community to play along. Lars brings the doll to church and to parties, and everyone plays along. Everyone treats his illness as real, and treats his doll with a great deal of respect. Truly, it was so beautiful. The whole community was rallying behind Lars and showing him such support because they wanted him to get well. It was such a beautiful way of supporting a mentally ill person.

Can you imagine what would happen if we survivors of incest and child sexual abuse were publicly acknowledged in such a fashion? If our friends and family and church, etc, let us be survivors? Can you imagine how quickly we would be healed if everyone acknowledged the wrongness of what happened to us and took a part in our healing process? Instead, most of us face disbelieving families and non-supportive communities that make us worse. And so we never really heal from wounds inflicted upon us as children. This is why you shouldn’t fuck kids.

3 Comments so far
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A point I’ve tried forever to make. Why can’t society be with us, or with someone else who needs that? I don’t mean always go around pretending to be with an imaginary friend, but just more accepting of our differences.

Comment by Ivory

Hi Butterfly,

“Can you imagine how quickly we would be healed if everyone acknowledged the wrongness of what happened to us and took a part in our healing process?”

Yes, I agree. And it would be a beautiful thing.

Good and healing thoughts to us all.


Comment by kate1975

Yes, that’s something I want too, to make surviving incest or childhood sexual assault a thing that people have compassion for and want to support a person in healing. I see small pieces of it from time to time. What amazes me is that out of every 10 people I tell about the sword dance, 8 of them have offered to come support when I do it. It gives me hope. Good and healing thoughts to us all too.

Comment by sworddancewarrior

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