Reasons You Shouldn’t Fuck Kids

Reason #149: Roman Polanski
February 4, 2010, 12:44 am
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: ,

I read celebrity gossip websites, and I love them. One that I have been reading for a long time is “Crazy Days and Nights”, and one of the reasons I like it so much is that the owner of the website always takes the right side in the war against child abuse. In a recent post, he wrote about Roman Polanski, and what a disgusting shithead he is for drugging and raping a 13 year old girl.  In case you don’t know, Roman Polanski is a very famous director.

Some asshole made this comment about the 13 year old girl: “As for the victim, have any of you ever read her deposition, which, by the way, was obviously coached. She admits to having had sex before and being a drug user. I’m so sick of people acting like the girl was this pure little thing that Roman dragged off a playground swing.” 

Okay, obviously the commenter is an asshole, but really what he is saying is something that most people are thinking.  His line of shit is exactly why most of us don’t go public with our history of abuse.  Somehow this person thinks that since a 13 year old girl has tried drugs and also had sex, then the fact that an adult raped her is somehow less valid than if she were a 13 year old girl who had never tried drugs or sex.  For me, I don’t see the connection, but to this asswipe, there is one.

His thought process, that children who have tried drugs and sex are less of a victim than those who have not, is the reason that many juries do not convict child molestors.  I have written before about this, but I’ll say it again.  There is a need for people to believe that bad things only happen to bad people who deserve bad things to happen to them.  I guess it comforts this idiot to believe that this 13 year old child was not innocent and thus ‘okay’ for rape.  I know the truth and it keeps me awake at night: bad things happen to good people every day, and it just fucking sucks.  13 year old girls are raped by famous directors and they never get justice.  He lives in his fucking chalet, and she lives with her nightmares and under-the-bed-and-in-the-closet-and-behind-the-door checks every night.  She gets startled by noises and is always looking over her shoulder because of what he did to her, while he directs movies and makes shitloads of money.

A long time ago, I made a life rule for myself that I would never lie.  I live by this rule.  I do not lie.  If I am unable to tell the truth in a particular situation (i.e., with my mother in law), I just do not speak at all.  My thought process is that if I never ever lie, you will never have reason to doubt my words.  Thus, if and when I go public with my history of abuse, you will never have cause to disbelieve me.  You will know I am telling the truth because I have never told you a falsehood or lie of any kind.

See how I think?  I am so sure that all of the shitheads in the world will not believe me, that I have formed my whole life around it.  This is why you shouldn’t fuck kids.

7 Comments so far
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When something like rape or molestation happens, people subconsciously try to find ways to justify it. It makes people uncomfortable that terrible things can happen, and their defense is to rationalize it. Blaming it on the survivor’s sexuality is simply a convenient excuse. It’s a way to keep living even though bad things happen. 😦

Comment by TreatInfamy

Yes, Roman Polanski is a shithead. If that 13 year old girl had tried drugs and sex before he raped her, it just shows he fits the profile for abusers who abuse kids outside their families. They pick children at risk, whose parents aren’t likely to notice or help. A child of 13 who has already had sex and drugs and whose parents permit a man to have unsupervised access to her has neglectful parents and is at risk for all kinds of abuse.

Comment by sworddancewarrior

One more bit – I have a thing about lying too. I prefer to be completely honest, even in social situations where lying a bit is expected (“how are you? Fine.”) I can tell when people are lying or fudging the truth a bit and I don’t trust them if they do. I won’t buy from a salesperson, for example, who isn’t completely frank about the pros and cons of the product when asked. I think being truthful and having integrity helps us be more credible about the abuse, but I agree it sucks that we’re already assumed to be lying by people who don’t want to believe something that rocks their belief system.

Comment by sworddancewarrior

Hi Butterfly,

You are a person of integrity with honor. That is uncommon. This issue effects me as well. I just recently got to a place where I don’t respond to demands that I disclose information and always tell the truth. Now I am working on feeling free to protect and honor myself before I do that to anyone else. And walking away or remaining silent are some choices that I am working on now.

I think that people who defend pedophiles are themselves perverts. They feel some need to say it is okay for one reason or another, when it never is. They are lying and I think, in their hearts, they know they are lying. That is so sick and pathetic.

Good and healing thoughts to you.


Comment by kate1975

I’ve always been disgusted by the Roman Polanski story. Why were people defending him? Just because he’s famous he gets a pass? NO!

Honestly, when I found out the rape took place at Jack Nicholson’s house, I thought differently of him, too. I know he wasn’t there, but my mind was screaming that something wasn’t right, and don’t these types stick together? I know it’s unfair for me to think that way since Jack Nicholson wasn’t around, but RP felt comfortable taking that young girl to his friend’s house, knowing full well he intended to rape her, to take advantage of her. It bugs me. It bugs me a lot.

Yeah, he gets to live the good life and get away with rape, get a pass b/c he is famous.

What kind of pass did *she* get? Ugh.

Comment by All Time Love

I actually read about this website on CDAN. Another poster mentioned ‘Reasons’ in the comments section of Enty’s Polanski post. I’m so glad they did.

While I consider myself a fairly healed survivor of childhood sexual abuse and rape (at the hands of my ex step-father and step-brother), it is still comforting to read these entries and be reminded that I am not alone. I went through years and years and years of therapy, one-on-one, with a mental health counselor but I never really discussed it with anyone else. Especially other survivors.

I never really knew what to say. Especially to my family. I came out to them years ago, but never really got ‘into’ the horror of it all. I don’t have your eloquence with words.
I have been emailing my mother links to your posts – the ones that really describe some of the things I still go through. Fear of the dark/closets, being overly watchful of children (mine especially) around other adults, worry, stress, sleepless nights. Through your words, she is able to understand what I go through – every day – even though I’m ‘fairly healed’.

So, thank you. I’m sure you get lots of thank yous and kudos for doing what you do. I hope you do, anyway. But just in case you don’t, I want you to know that your message is getting out there and that I appreciate you and this website. You have without a doubt helped at least one person: Me.

Comment by girlyfriday

Hi Gal Friday,

Thank you for your kind words – I appreciate it.

– Butterfly

Comment by butterflysblog

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