Reasons You Shouldn’t Fuck Kids


Reason #213: Me and my Mom
January 12, 2011, 1:49 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , ,

I had an alone session with the therapist, and we talked about my upcoming together session with my mom.  I explained what happened with my mom, how she said she resents me for making her feel guilty about the sex abuse.  I told her that ever since she said it, I can’t help but focus on all the ways that she just wasn’t there for me.  I said that maybe my mom picked up on my own store of anger, and maybe that’s what she resents me for.

So then my therapist came out with this bomb: “Has your mom ever acknowledged her role in the abuse?”

I said “Uh, what?”

She said “You know, has she apologized to you?”

I said “How do you mean?”

She said “Butterfly, she had a role in this.  She says she resents you for making her feel guilty, but really I bet if she examined that guilt, she is actually feeling guilty about her role in what happened to you.  As a mother, she didn’t protect you.”

So I sat there for a minute, trying to absorb this.  This session didn’t go at all the way I thought it would, in that I figured it was a semantics issue, but the therapist understood this issue for what it really was.  My mom covering her true feelings by projecting them onto me, and me covering my true feelings because I am afraid of being mad at my mom.

This is the 213th way that being sexually abused as a child has affected me in the last two years.  That’s why you shouldn’t fuck kids.


3 Comments so far
Leave a comment

Good and healing thoughts to you.

Kate

Comment by kate1975

It is safe and okay to be angry at your mother now. It really is.
cyber-hugs to you,
SDW

Comment by sworddancewarrior

[…] Reason #213: Me and my Mom […]

Pingback by Reason #214: Scenes from our together session, Part I « Reasons You Shouldn’t Fuck Kids




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