Reasons You Shouldn’t Fuck Kids

Reason #220: Powerless, but not helpless
February 6, 2011, 8:27 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , ,

I was talking to my mom today, and we both said that we thought that perhaps a greater good could come from my abuse. We both believe that perhaps good could come from bad.

Then our conversation turned to my panic, and she asked me if I had thought about trying some anti-anxiety medicine.  I told her I had already tried some, and it didn’t work.  Then I said “The truth is though, no matter what happens, I think I will always be afraid like this, and I have come to terms with that.” And when I say “afraid”, she knows exactly what I mean. Panic when I am alone or at night, always feeling something with me in the bedroom, etc.

She said “Sweetie – you feel powerless over these fears, but you are not helpless. You are seeking treatment for your fears. They are doing such great research on the brain now, always finding out new things that could help you. Who knows what they’ll discover? You feel powerless, but you are not helpless.”

It was such a beautiful thing to say, so filled with hope.  And I needed to be reminded that hope exists.  And really she is right.  We may feel powerless, but we aren’t.  We have found some way to survive the terrible things that happened to us.  We were powerless over the things that happened to us.  We were powerless then, we are not now, but we still feel powerless.  We were helpless then, but we are not now, and we are learning that. 

May all of us survivors of child sexual abuse find our power and use it for good.

3 Comments so far
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“May all of us survivors of child sexual abuse find our power and use it for good.” – Word.

I’m by no means someone who takes medication uncritically, heck I barely even take an aspirin when I have a headache. However, I have heard people say that all the medications work a little differently, and if one doesn’t work, another one might. If it’s true for some people it might be true for you. It might be worth a shot to try out a few of the anti-anxiety meds and see if one of the other ones work.

Also, have you tried passionflower? I saw a report on the Dr. Oz show where he said this herb was evaluated as being as effective as some of the anti-anxiety drugs.

I’ve tried it once or twice and it did help (I ground up the dried herb and put it in gelatin capsules, with a dose of one capsule), although in general my anxiety is pretty manageable. I didn’t take it consistently so I don’t know how that would be.


Comment by sworddancewarrior

Hi Warrior – I have tried a few anti-anxiety meds – nothing has worked so far. However, I am intrigued by this passionflower idea! I have never even heard of that. Where would I go for that? A homeopathic doctor?

Comment by butterflysblog

Hi Butterfly,

On the same theme as alternative healing methods, have you tried any essential oils, many are good for helping anxiety.

Herbs are good too and here in the town where I live is an alternative store where you can come in and have a conversation with a trained herbalist person and they recommend what dried herbs to buy, and you get them right away. A survivor friend that I knew ten years ago got recommended passionflower as well. And pink monkey flower.

I don’t do very well with prescribed medicines, the side effects are huge and the drug doesn’t do much in the area it is supposed to help me. But I get a lot of help through alternative methods. I also use my reiki training to help myself and it does help for physical as well as mental health issues.

Becoming empowered starts when we feel and talk and cry and do. It may not feel that way, but that is the beginning of becoming empowered. We are saying that our thoughts, our experiences, our feelings matter and that is a revolutionary thing.

She is right, hope exists. You are right, we are not powerless. You are right, power can be used to do good for others. Good and healing thoughts to you.


Comment by kate1975

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